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Should I stay or should I go?

No, I'm not talking about the latest referendum, I'm thinking about the many tough challenges that life sometimes throws at us, where making a decision isn't at all easy or clear cut, and sometimes it's easier to do nothing and accept an unhappy situation by default. Perhaps we stay far too long in a job that pays well but we really detest. We may live with being bullied or abused because that is familiar and it feels too hard to get out of. We may put up with a partner's problem drinking instead of challenging it. There are many similar life patterns where we know things aren't right, but don't know what to do for the best.

We may end up getting angry with ourselves for our indecision, because normally we are good at making decisions, but some are just too confusing to know clearly what to do. In these circumstances counselling may be able to help. The counsellor won't tell you what to do - they don't know your situation well enough - but what they can do is to help you get things clear in your own mind. They may gently question some assumptions that you are making, help you to evaluate beliefs that limit you, or explore with you the differences between what your head is telling you to do and what your heart says is right for you.

A counsellor doesn't need to be an expert in your situation to help. You may find that simply the process of explaining your situation to an impartial person who listens carefully without judging can help you to clarify your own thoughts. Once you are clear in your own mind, it's usually not a big step from there to knowing what to do.

If this article has resonated with you and you would like to work with a counsellor on this, or any other issue, then please get in contact.





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